For some time now I have chosen to stay away from serious relationships. I constantly find myself in the position of the "single friend". The one EVERYONE is trying to hook up with their wonderfully charming friends, sons, cousins, co-workers, nephews, etc......the list goes on and on.
They keep trying to figure out what is terribly wrong with me. I guess I am not looking for love, at least right now. I must also admit that I am not very good at being the "girlfriend" and relationship dymanics tend to bore me. To add to my oddity, I feel that I am not ready for marriage any time soon and will not be for quite some time. I just feel that I have so much to do and figure out on my own before I can commit.
I used to think that I fit into the typical modern independent woman mentality. But as I share my view with other twenty-something females, I find that the reception to my "delussional ideas" on love and relationships is not so warm. Most females still have the desire of marriage before 30 and the ticking of their biological clocks is lound and clear.
I am commonly called a cynic by my friends. I can remember one instance where my girlfriends and I were looking over a bridal magazine (which by the way brings out the fairy tale dilussions in most women) and I saw a dress and casually commented that that would make a perfect 2nd wedding gown. My friends just stared at me in shock. I guess I've simply added the possibility of failure in my definition of love. But looking on the bright side, I've also added the possibility of second chances (a secoond wedding).
Don't get me wrong, I want to fall in love, someday. I simply don't believe in setting deadlines for love.
People say I'm a dreamer...I call it a defense mechanism against life.
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